A Weirdo in Dog's Clothing

 

I almost posted about how not racist the Small Town lyrics were even though it's still an awful New Country song but I decided on this story instead:

Man who spent $20K to transform into dog steps out for first public walk

Lots of wrongs on this one: a man with a dog fetish spends 20 grand on a Hallowe'en costume and believes he's an animal.  This story reminds me of something else along the same lines.  It's escaping me now.

This dog is not a real princess

“Do you remember your dreams from when you are little? You want to be a hero or a wizard,” he (Toco-san; the man who bought a dog costume) wrote in the clip, describing his life-dog dog dream as seemingly “unrealistic.”

Who the hell wants to be a wizard when you're 10?  Sure, wielding magic is cool but nobody wants to look like Santa Claus at 10.

“I remember writing in my grade school graduation book that I wanted to be a dog and walk outside.”

“I turned into a dog and went out on the town!”

Toco-san is not a dog.  Maybe the Japanese word is lost in the translation but he didn't literally turn into a dog.  Sure clothes make the man, but an adult putting on a costume doesn't make you anything more than a weirdo in a costume.

I remember when I was a kid and I wanted to fly like Superman.  I'd safety pin a red towel around my neck and leap off the sofa and as far as I got was the floor.  Since I'm not from Krypton, the glow of the yellow sun did not enhance any of my abilities.  It's a bitter pill to swallow when you're 6 years old but I knew since neither of my parents were from Krypton, I would never be able to really fly.

"Actual dogs walking knew something wasn’t quite right as far as Toco’s collie went."

“The dogs were not fooled lol. That must’ve been freaky for them,” one person observed.

Another added, “You can always count on children and animals to be 100% genuine.  I completely relate to the dogs’ reactions of ‘wtf is that creepy thing?!’”

This dog will never be Italian

I bet Toco's a little sad.  Even though he dressed like a dog, the real dogs were not fooled.  That's so strange because Toco himself said "I turned into a dog".  Didn't the other dogs know that Toco was a dog because he said so?  I wonder why a real dog would get freaked out about a guy in a dog costume pretending to be one of them?

This is bugging me.  I can't remember where I heard this kind of thing before.  It's not necessarily a dog costume but... Shit.  Someone dresses as something else and thinks that they're that actual something else... I hope I remember by the end of this blog entry.

One loser's comment was: “Their parents said that they could be anything when they grew up. They wanted to be a dog and made it happen. As bizarre as it is I’ll give them props for fulfilling their dream.”

He didn't make anything "happen" other than to play dress-up.  And if that's your dream, I recommend dreaming for something a little more practical like dreaming of winning the lottery.  Also, the article said Toco's parents were "very surprised" so I don't think they were there every step of the way.

I still can't remember where else I heard a story like this but I do remember just because it looks like a dog and barks like a dog doesn't necessarily it make it a dog.