If you talk to kids born after 1990, they think vinyl is
cool. Old-timers will refer to something
called "The Vinyl Experience" that kids also think is cool. "The Vinyl Experience" is the
"ritual" (I've seen that word used) for physically holding the
record, looking at the cover, taking the record out of the sleeve, putting it
on the turn table and then some kind of aural nirvana is reached. That takes about 5 - 7 seconds but apparently
it's an experience.
Let me tell you about my latest vinyl experience:
Last week, I ordered Black Sabbath's Technical Ecstasy with
white coloured vinyl from Amazon. I
cringed when I saw it was made by Rhino Records but it was the “cheapest” of
all the coloured Black Sabbath records so I thought, "why not?".
The record came in damaged, so thanks to Amazon for their
piss-poor shipping practices on that one.
How poor? Have a look at the
picture. Some genius at Amazon thought
that shipping a record in an oversized box with mini air bags thrown in there
should be sufficient. And here's how the
record turned out. Surprise. They may as well slapped an address label and
a stamp on the album and thrown it in the mail.
Getting back to the experience, I take the cellophane off
and pull out the album from the damaged sleeve.
The white vinyl sure does look cool.
I put the album on the platter, close the dustcover and hit Start. Surprise, the song skips. Hmmm... it also sounds kind of wonky, not
unlike being on a boat. Stop. Open the lid.
Ah, the record's warped; about an inch high on one quadrant. Have a look at the picture.
I didn't listen to the rest.
I put the warped album back in the damaged cover and put on the CD since
I was in the mood for listening to the songs.
That was my latest vinyl experience.
Why the experience was so poor was because I purchased a
record made by Rhino Records. I have
more botched "new" vinyl from Rhino than any other company in my
record collection. And I'm blaming Rhino
because their name is on the label.
Frankly, I don't care who they contract it out to. Rhino should give up making vinyl because
they honestly don't know how to do it properly. Vinyl is a record companies'
last kick at the can to stay around a little bit longer. If I saw the end coming, I’d be making an
effort not to keep producing garbage. I
have other things to spend $25 on than a piece of garbage from Rhino when I can
go to the dumpster for free.
Don't get me wrong, I've purchased enough "new"
vinyl from other companies and I'm completely convinced that anyone that currently
manufactures vinyl LPs is completely incompetent and useless at their job. It's just that Rhino vinyl is consistently
poor. I take that back, Rhino is
exceptionally good at making poor quality LPs.
And to charge double the price for an album compared to a flawless CD is
criminal.
What's also adds to the frustration is that a stack of
records I found in my parents' basement (I forgot to take them when I moved
out). Even though they smell a little
musty, the old records still play all the way through and are excellent
compared current reissues made from 180 Scam Vinyl. And I didn't get that distracting little
voice in my head that says "don't enjoy it too much because it'll skip
somewhere" like I do when I'm listening to a Rhino record.
After this latest "vinyl experience", I even cancelled
my (at the time) pre-ordered Rolling Stones in Mono vinyl box set and I ordered
the CDs instead (excellent, by the way).
I don’t know if my nerves could take 16 albums that may or may not play. Now that I think of it, I don't think I'll be
buying a "new" record again.
Just because I have a little bit of disposable income lately doesn't
mean I have to throw it away.
So you kids that think vinyl is cool, you should have been
around when you could listen to a record all the way through. Man, those were the days.
